Spiritual Friendship - 4 Ways of Jesus We Can Learn

Two people are walking side by side down a long and winding road without an ending point in sight. With backpacks on, it appears this journey is intentional. These people are likely discussing things they’re thinking about as they walk, maybe things from the past, or maybe dreams for the future. Though the road will change from day to day, the weather will change, the challenges they face will change, and the victories they experience will change, the one thing that remains the same is their togetherness on the journey. 

Science shows that when people walk in the same direction with one another, even without their awareness, their rhythm and pace match up. It’s called “motor synchrony.” It’s an automatic response of the human body to mirror the movement of the other person, and it promotes psychological bonding and emotional well-being. At a level that is even unconscious, we are designed to sync up with others.  

God created us this way. He created us to need a spiritual friend and to be a spiritual friend along the journey of life. What’s a spiritual friend? It is someone who matches the rhythm and pace of another’s soul, seeking to tune into the presence of Jesus together.

Jesus himself offers the perfect example of being a spiritual friend.  We have a lot to learn from him as he walks with two disciples along Emmaus Road, in Luke 24:13-35. Jesus joined the disciples on a physical journey, but more importantly, he joined them on a spiritual journey. 

The two disciples were walking along in despair, trying to process what had just happened in Jerusalem with Jesus’s crucifixion three days before. They were hopeless and confused because they thought Jesus had come to be the Savior of Israel, and now he was dead. 

Then a “stranger” (who was Jesus himself, risen from the dead) joined the two pilgrims on the road, but they didn’t recognize him. Jesus wanted to help the disciples discern his presence in their lives, even now. As a spiritual friend, though, he knew they first needed to process what was going on in their hearts. Jesus just joined them as they walked, right where they were in their emotional pain. 

He simply asked them questions. In essence, he said, Why are you sad? What is going on in your hearts? Then he listened as they explained all the things they were discouraged about. As they talked, Jesus did not minimize their sorrow, interrupt them, or immediately solve their problems, though he certainly could have. 

When we are with someone who is in pain or sorrow, it’s tempting to want to rush in and offer solutions immediately.  But Jesus shows how he was willing to join these disciples in their pain before offering a solution. He could have announced that he had risen from the dead and therefore they had nothing to worry about, but he didn’t. Why? As a spiritual friend, it seems it was important to Jesus to simply listen first. 

After listening, it was then time to speak. Jesus reminded them what “all of Scripture” had to say about God. He offered a broader, Biblical perspective. He was in essence saying: “Remember what all of Scripture says about Christ  . . . remember that God’s ways are bigger than your ways . . . remember that the way you perceive things now is not all there is. And remember that Scripture says even Christ would have to suffer.” The disciples were amazed by how much this “stranger” knew of Scripture.

In pointing them to Scripture, Jesus was guiding them toward what he wanted them to eventually discern (himself!)  He needed to remind them of the broader context of Scripture so they could find themselves, and their circumstances, in God’s larger story. It was taking the disciples time to discern Jesus’ presence. Journeys take time. As a spiritual friend, Jesus offered a Biblical perspective to help them begin to perceive things in a new way. 

By the time the disciples reached their home in Emmaus, they urged Jesus to come in and stay with them. Jesus went into their home, and then an interesting thing happened as they sat down to eat. Luke 24:30-32 says: 

When he (Jesus) was at the table with them, he took bread, gave thanks, broke it and began to give it to them. And then their eyes were opened and they recognized him. (v. 32)

They finally saw Jesus. At this profound moment, they discerned the presence of Jesus. 

Suddenly everything made sense as they recognized Jesus, alive. He was not dead! There was no longer reason to despair. And then, they realized, all this time Jesus had been with them as they walked, but they hadn’t known it. Jesus had been present all along, listening, offering perspective, and guiding them to discover his presence.

This is the point of spiritual friendship - to help others discover the living presence of Jesus. To walk with others along the road of life and “see” Jesus, sometimes in new and unexpected ways that take time to discern. 

PROMPT: From Jesus we learn how to offer spiritual friendship. Read Luke 24:13-35  and imagine yourself in the scene, walking along Emmaus Road with Jesus, watching how he was a spiritual friend. Consider choosing one person you could encourage this week towards Jesus’ presence with one of the ways Jesus modeled:

1. Join another on their journey

2. Ask questions and listen

3. Offer perspective from Scripture

4. Help them discern Jesus’s presence