A Better Kind of Relationship

Take a moment and think back to middle school. Remember taking a life science class? You may have learned about ecosystems and how different organisms relate to each other. My 7th grade science teacher explained the three ways organisms usually relate to each other like this:

Some organisms, she said, relate through competition, fighting for the same resources. Other organisms relate with commensalism, where one organism benefits while the other remains totally unaffected. And finally, some organisms relate through parasitism, where one organism benefits and the other is negatively impacted.

This analogy from life science came to mind recently as I was considering the various forms of church today and how they relate to one another. It’s another “ecosystem” of sorts, a church ecosystem. The different forms and different denominations relate to each other in the shared ecosystem of the Body of Christ.

And sometimes, it seems, different forms of church relate to each other with the same tendencies we learned from life science class: competition, commensalism, or parasitism.

For example, sometimes different churches in an area fight for the same congregants (competition). At other times, one church in an area may develop something like a community outreach that thrives in its city, but they do not invite neighboring churches to take part (commensalism). And finally, sometimes one church attempts to gain power by putting down other forms of church (parasitism).

But what if there is an alternative, better kind of relationship for different forms of church?

A number of years ago, I moved to a new city and began the process of looking for a church. My boss invited me to come and check out the house church he was a part of. I had grown up in large churches my whole life and house church sounded foreign to me. My thoughts were spinning:

What do they do about elders? How do they interact with God’s word? What is the difference between a house church and a Bible study? Do they think they are somehow better than traditional churches? All of these questions made me a bit skeptical as I visited this house church.

I was in for a beautiful surprise.

Within this house church community, I experienced a group of people who were deeply committed to Jesus and to one another. I had the chance to see all of the members contributing their gifts as we gathered to worship and learn from God’s word. I wept with the men of my house church as we each expressed the difficult circumstances we were walking through and cried out to God on one another’s behalf.

I had experienced traditional, denominational churches with great teaching and with great impact in the local community. Now, I was receiving a masterclass in how another form of church, a much smaller form, operated like a tight-knit family.

Experiencing this different expression of church deeply formed me. God in his sovereignty knew that I needed to grow and stretch spiritually by being exposed to a house church. I needed to learn that different forms of church are not in competition or comparison to one another; rather, they are good in different ways. This made me think about how different forms of church actually work together. To go back to my life science analogy, there’s an alternative, better kind of relationship to describe the way different forms of church relate. It’s a relationship that promotes one another’s well-being. It’s called mutualism.

Mutualism describes a relationship when both organisms benefit from one another. You may be familiar with the example of the Remora fish and the whale. These tiny fish help clean the gigantic whale (benefiting the whale); in return, the fish are protected from predators (benefiting the fish). Both organisms need each other to thrive.

The same relationship of mutualism can exist between different forms of church. Different forms serve different purposes, but they are “one in spirit and purpose” (Phil. 2:2). They share the same “ecosystem,” to promote the well-being of each other and build up the whole Body, the bride of Christ.

It’s a beautiful thing when different kinds of churches learn from one another and benefit each other through a relationship of mutualism. This kind of relationship seeks to use the differences of each to strengthen the life of both. For example:

• What if a church saw a weak spot in their community, asked another local church who excelled in that area to teach them, and then collaborated to meet the need?

• What if local church leaders understood that some members might need a different kind of community depending on their faith journey . . . and then encouraged them to attend another church?

• What if a church affirmed the start of another local church, because it would help reach the shared community for Christ?

When the capital “C” Church operates with mutualism, it is not seeking uniformity, but unity. We unite around Jesus as our precious Savior, around his mission to be salt and light in the world. Unity is really only possible when different forms of church intend to bring about each other’s well-being - learning, helping, and strengthening the other - that they may be “one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3:28).

Since we live in a world that operates on principles of comparison, competition, and power, it’s important to remember that the Church is called to something different. We are called to be unique, and different, forms of Christ’s body to the world. We’re not all hands, nor are we all feet. We need each other’s forms - traditional churches, house churches, denominational churches, nondenominational churches - to serve the kingdom best in the ecosystem of God.

The body is a unit, though it is made up of different parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ.

1 Corinthians 12:12